Monday, January 09, 2006

Cleaning Out My Closet

I bought a bunch of clothes on my recent trip to the US. (Jeans are way less expensive in the US than they are here!) In order to make room for the new stuff, I had to clean out/up my closet a little bit. I went through everything and pulled out all of the clothes that I haven't worn in six months to a year. There is one thing in common with everything I pulled out. They are all too big.

Back in another life when I lived in the US and worked at a schoolhouse, I wore khakis and button up shirts every day. They were my little Mr. Rogers outfits. Nothing too flashy for the kids (or the parents). I looked nice but blah...boring. Part of this teacher garb was being comfortable and covering up. Plus, it's a real pain when playdough dries on your Dolce jeans and won't come out. Another reason I looked like Pat from SNL is that very few stores carry things in my size. Have you ever tried looking for size 27-28 jeans? Well, they are like the freakin' holy grail of clothes- good luck! So, I end up with a closet full of things that don't fit well.

The sizes in the US are just all messed up - small is not small. I am not a medium; I am extra small. Don't even get me started on this relaxed fit crap that swallows me like a flea caught in a 40 gallon trash bag. There are super-few places in the mall that carry extra small sizes. That's why the internet is such a wonderful thing. I can order clothes in my size! (Of course the shipping and returning can be a pain.)

But every once in a while I'll think that I am bigger than I am or something - or the mirrors in the shop make me look better (bigger) in the store than they do at home. Or all of those times my mom said, "You'll grow into it." have really altered my shopping psychology - but I find myself putting down the plastic knowing that the thing in the bag is too big. But what is a guy to do? It's a size small and they don't have a smaller one.

So in 2006 I am working this problem from both ends. One, I am only going to buy things that fit - really. Two, I am going to keep working on my beefcake plan. I'll keep you posted on how it goes. Hmm - maybe I should track my progress with some photos - maybe that'll drum up some traffic.


At 1/09/2006 4:41 PM, Blogger Adam said...

I think they have what you're looking for in France. I work with mostly french people and the men are sooo tiny. They all wear 29'' W jeans but they have to get them in France.

At 1/09/2006 9:07 PM, Blogger ifyouwillit said...

There's nothing like moving to Israel to make your clothes fall from your waist. If only there was a decent place to replace them.

At 1/09/2006 10:16 PM, Blogger Sam said...

And I've been sucking in my gut since I was 10... I'll give you a bit of me, if you'll take it! (ewwwww.... that's gross!)

At 1/10/2006 5:07 AM, Blogger Donnie said...

Yes..yes, definitely keep us posted via photos. That's a WONDERFUL idea!

At 1/10/2006 6:45 PM, Anonymous אביב said...

אני תמיד קונה 29 כי 28 מאד נפוצה כאן ותמיד כשיש מבצע טוב הם נגמרים הכי מהר.

At 1/10/2006 8:13 PM, Blogger Sweettooth120 said...

Not sure if you read Neil's Citizen of the Month, but your mention of Dolce Jeans, just reminded me of his post a few days ago. It has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with what you are writing about, but nevertheless it's hilarious.


Post a Comment

<< Home